The Real Thing. Brought to You by Coca Cola

I am getting to an age when there are pressures to be a “real thing.” The American Dream of a white picket fence and a guy that wears a fedora and comes home to wife wearing a dress and heels offering up a feast that took hours to prepare, no doubt.

Old 1950s ad - itsuckstogrowup

Like this, but with a heavier hand with the misogyny.

The Modern Family, Revised.

We are far removed from that lifestyle, buddy. The Nuclear Family no longer exists in most cases. That’s not to say it doesn’t ever exist, but the likelihood of it’s existence is becoming endangered, if not extinct. Of course, there is something to be said about a 1950’s lifestyle, when one income was enough to support an entire family. But also, that meant subjugation. Women were expected to stay at home and wear a dress and cook dinner and clean the house. Instead, in a modern family, whatever that is really, the duties are shared.

The thing we have, you and I, that’s new. Co-Parenting is kind of a new concept, and that means I get to spend a lot of time with you, which rocks. You are a giant pain in my ass for a good part of the time, but you make up for it with your sweet kisses and hugs. I can’t get enough of them to be honest. When you’re with me, it’s just the two of us, which is a challenge, but it’s also a good thing. We’re building a relationship that, historically, hasn’t really happened with dads and kids. We’re a team, you and I, and we’re learning how to be together, alone. I get to try and interpret your yelling and screaming, and I’m doing a pretty good job with it, to be fair, and you get to learn that I am a benevolent dictator.

Single Dad Life-y-ness

1950's homemaker ad - itsuckstogrowup

I bet that shit is delish, and she looks DTF, if you know what I’m sayin’.

The truth is, I am truly learning what it means to be a single dad, and there isn’t much glorification involved. I though the skies would open and the heavens would rain panties upon me, but I am still just myself and I don’t really get out much. Internet porn and whiskey will suffice, if need be—and it needs be. But when I am not with you, I am cleaning up your goddamn mess, or preparing for your goddamn mess to transpire. It’s a good existence, and I can say honestly that I am content with my life. I have a fulfilling job, which I wouldn’t have expected a few years ago: making people want things, but I’m good at it, and it pays for this apartment and almost all the bills, save the back-log that requires a nod on occasion.

So perhaps this is the new Real Thing (brought to you by Coca Cola Inc.) is just what your life ends up being, and despite being quite different than what I was expecting or hoping for, has ended up being The Real Thing (brought to you by Coca Cola Inc.) At least without all the fanfare.

Keep being a kid and being amazed with the world, and I’ll keep being here to show it to you.



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